Sunday, May 24, 2009

The Slaughtering of Pigs...

Yes, that's what the DI's call it, here. Every time we Officer Candidates are on our faces for not complying with instructions, or really just on the whim of our class DI, it's called "getting killed". They lovingly call it "the slaughtering of pigs". We're nasty candidates. We're gross and sweaty and many of us are injured or sick.
Why do we do this, one might ask? Every night, (if you're me, then it's every time you're struggling with the push-ups and 60 to 90 leg lifts) we ask this question--absolutely with out a doubt...EVERY NIGHT.
The answer seems to be always the same. We go through this hell by choice, because the outcome is the ability to pin on those shiny bars and choke through the oath that takes us from being nasty candidates to Commissioned Officers in the US Navy.

An update: I am currently in "H" or holding class right now, as I was unfortunate enough to sprain my rotater cuff. Uggh. The blessing is that in "H" I have made a few great friends, one of which just rolled into my old class. Some of the others will be rolling into the next class, 25-09, with me. I am also grateful, as there seemed to be no way for me to compete with--even keep up with, some of the guys in my former class. One is a Navy Seal. Need I say more? Although they scare the piss out of me, I really respect the Marine DI's here. Most of them are Gunnery Sgts., and many will be heading out to Iraq in the next turn of classes. My former DI had the lucky reputation as the most intense and difficult DI of the bunch...we were on our faces, doing push ups and the like, every other second. Not fun. Even though I was crazy scared, like I said, I know he did and does this because he wants us to be the best Naval Officers that can be offered.
I just hope that I am able to support my comrades and progress in the next 13 weeks.

Keep praying for me, guys...I really am depending on these prayers!
Pax et Bonum
CO. Bree Dail, USN

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Swearing In...

Pictures of taking the Oath of Service for the US Navy witnessed by Lt. Zedaker, USN

















...Looks like I'm in the Navy, now!!! Anchor's Away!

My virtual puppy--Aslan!

Thursday, April 09, 2009

Gethsemane - truly Art as CONTEMPLATION

Steve Balsamo, one of my favorite vocalists, in his starring role as Jesus in "JC, Superstar".
Great meditation for tonight. I hope you all are as inspired by his rendition as much as I am.
He is also in a great band, "The Storys". Find them on iTunes.
Pax

One month and counting!



Good evening, ladies. Good evening, gentlemen!
After much ado, some of it about nothing...ahem...I am very proud to announce that I have been officially accepted into Navy OCS as a Surface Warfare Candidate Officer. What follows will be 13 weeks of relative hell, training in Newport, RI.
I have yet to receive the package, giving me specifics on what to bring, etc. although I have already been given my class date, and will prob. be sworn in next week. I've also cut my hair and dyed it (brownish red--but closer to my natural color) in anticipation for training. I like it, and think it would look great LONG in this color, so I'll be trying that after graduation and commission! I regret that I will not be posting the exact date of entry, as I am sure that there is some DI somewhere looking for possible leads on who we are before we set foot on base for training. I am loathe to give them more fodder for what will likely be a colorful list of vocal insults for them to use whenever it so pleases them. Marines are hard-core, I'm not looking to tempt them any further than I already will, what with my natural curvy frame--let alone the fact that I am female in a male-dominated industry.
What I will hint at, is that I will already be training by the END of next month, so if you are inclined to write a letter of support (I would be MOST grateful--especially if it includes current event updates), I will post the address as soon as I have it.

In other news, as I am going to have to suffer without the luxuries of music or film--not to mention the comfort and friendship of Honey, my Labrador Retriever--I have decided to go overboard and watch as many of the DVDs in my collection as possible, and then review why I choose to add them to my collection in the first place. Some of you will find my choices and, yes, even my critiques to be a bit odd...and of course, you may post your own thoughts to add to mine, but as you all know I love good films, and love the art of bashing poor films. So I just can't wait to post on my daily movie reviews.

Last night, I rewatched "Hotel Rwanda" starring Don Cheadle.

I don't really know why I choose this film to start out with, only that it is one of my favorite true-to-life tragities, documented in an award-winning screenplay. I remember once, speaking to a friend from Nigeria, who I lived with when in Boston (some of you know that history, and some don't. I will not go into it now), who knew nothing of the atrocities that occurred, and are still occuring, in the mid-1990's. She actually became insensed when I tried to explain that people were mass murdered by machete, and that situations such as this were still occuring in the Sudan. The tribal warfare between the Hutus (many being Islamic or Animists) and Tutsis (a majority being Christian, most Roman Catholic).
Although the fighting has been more about tribal racism rather than religious, it nevertheless strikes a chord when looking at what is occuring in Darfur and other wartorn areas of Africa.
I love and hate this movie. I love it for the painfully artistic, phenominal acting and directing. When I watch this movie, I no longer feel like I am just observing, but am drawn into this dark reality which it portrays, as if I were one of the tourists actually witnessing the heroics and the atrocities in Rwanda. The score is absolutly beautiful, as well. I hate this movie for the fact that even after the Holocaust, the world--especially the UN and the European nations--turn blind eyes to ethnic cleansing until it effects them on a national level. I digress a little to vent. What use is the UN to these people in this movie? Nothing. No use. This sickens me, because ever since it was formed, the UN has sucked so much of the US revenue and military aid while doing nothing when genocide is clearly taking place--even when their own forces are attacked. I, for one am tired of this useless organization. If we choose to police the world like we do, anyways, fighting the majority of the wars in Iraq and Afganistan by ourselves...we need not continue to support the UN in it's comical attempt to maintain a power it bled out years ago. They did not maintain their sanctions against Iraq, nor are they doing so with Iran or North Korea. Darfur, Rwanda and other war-torn areas of the world attest to their utter failure in follow-through regarding their sanctions and demiliterization.
So, yes, I love this movie. I also abhore that the whole theme behind the film is still occuring in Darfur, Sudan and Rwanda.

Tonight, as it is Holy Thursday, I will be watching "Jesus of Nazareth", and tomorrow, "The Passion of the Christ".
Don't forget that the Divine Mercy Novena starts tomorrow!
I will not post until Saturday, but pray that you all have a blessed Triddium!
Pax et Bonum

Monday, February 16, 2009

Whe eez thee redarrr? Wat eez tat noise?

Oh, man...I'd lay money down that this was ALL on the Frogs. Note the name of their vessel--priceless.

LONDON – Nuclear-armed submarines from Britain and France collided in the Atlantic Ocean earlier this month, authorities acknowledged Monday — touching off new concerns about the safety of the world's deep sea missile fleets.

The HMS Vanguard, the oldest vessel in Britain's nuclear-armed submarine fleet, and the French Le Triomphant submarine, which was also carrying nuclear missiles, both suffered minor damage in the collision. No crew members were reported injured.

Britain's most senior sailor, First Sea Lord, Adm. Jonathon Band, said the underwater crash posed no risk to the safety of the submarines' nuclear reactors and nuclear missiles. But he offered no explanation of how the rare incident might have occurred.

"The two submarines came into contact at very low speed," Band said in a statement. "Both submarines remained safe."

France's defense ministry said the ballistic missile submarines had been carrying out routine patrols when they collided.

"They briefly came into contact at a very low speed while submerged. There were no injuries. Neither their nuclear deterrence missions nor their safety were affected," France's defense ministry said Monday in a statement.

Still, the HMS Vanguard was towed back to a submarine base in Scotland with visible dents and scrapes, the BBC reported.

Le Triomphant suffered damaged to a sonar dome but returned under its own power to its base on L'Ile Longue on France's western tip, France said.

Neither France or Britain would confirm the exact date of the collision, but said it took place earlier this month.

The French military had issued a statement Feb 6. saying that one of its submarines had struck a submerged object — "probably a container" — but did not say the Le Triomphant had collided with another vessel.

Britain did not comment on the incident until Monday, after some details were reported by the British media. The defense ministry said the government's usual policy is not to comment on submarine deployments.

Naval experts said they were amazed by the collision.

"This really shouldn't have happened at all," said Stephen Saunders, a retired British Royal Navy commodore and the editor of Jane's Fighting Ships. "It's a very serious incident, and I find it quite extraordinary."

He said while NATO countries let each other know what general area of the Atlantic they are operating in, neither submarine would have had a precise position for the other.

Saunders said submarines don't always turn on their radar systems, or make their presence obvious to other shipping.

"The whole point is to go and hide in a big chunk of ocean and not be found. They tend to go around very slowly and not make much noise," he said.

Some British lawmakers demanded an explanation from Prime Minister Gordon Brown's government.

"(The government) needs to explain how it is possible for a submarine carrying weapons of mass destruction to collide with another submarine carrying weapons of mass destruction in the middle of the world's second-largest ocean," lawmaker Angus Robertson of the opposition Scottish National Party said.

HMS Vanguard came into service in 1993, has a crew of around 140 and typically carries 16 Lockheed Trident D5 missiles. Under government policy, British nuclear submarines carry a maximum of 48 warheads. At least one of Britain's four submarines is on patrol and ready to fire at any given time.

British lawmakers in 2007 approved a 20 billion-pound ($30 billion) program to replace the fleet with new nuclear-armed submarines.

France's Le Triomphant carries 111 crew and 15 nuclear missiles, according to defense analysis group Jane's.

Anti-nuclear groups said the crash should remind the world just how dangerous nuclear submarines really are.

"This reminds us that we could have a new catastrophe with a nuclear submarine at any moment. It is a risk that exists during missions but also in port," said Stephane Lhomme, a spokesman for the French anti-nuclear group Sortir du Nucleaire, "These are mobile nuclear reactors."

Britain's Campaign for Nuclear Disarmament called on Brown to end his country's nuclear submarine patrols of the Atlantic.

"The collision of two submarines, both with nuclear reactors and nuclear weapons onboard, could have released vast amounts of radiation and scattered scores of nuclear warheads across the seabed," the group said.

___

Associated Press Writers Jennifer Quinn in London and Jamey Keaten and Angela Charlton in Paris contributed to this story.

Monday, December 15, 2008

At Long Last...MOVIE REVIEWS!

Indeed, it has been far too long since I have done any review work for the plenitude of films--whether classics or new releases, not to mention foreign and indie films--that I have watched in the last few months. Yes. I have no life in Indiana other than eat, sleep, work, exercise and...watch great films!

In the spirit of Christmastide, I will present two lists--the naughty and the nice. The naughty list should have you wanting to throw coal at the producers/actors by the end of my reviews. The nice list will have you pining, I hope, for your next free night to snuggle up, in your pajamas-- with a good hot toddie or hot chocolate and peppermint schnapps, and go on a movie watching spree!!

NAUGHTY LIST:

Sideways
-starring Paul Giamatti and Thomas Haiden Church.This obscene and shallow film was awarded numerous times by the thespian community, including an Oscar. It always amazes me that so many people claim poor writing coupled with plots celebrating what is base, immoral and unfortunate in human existence as "artistic". I sat, wincing through 126 miserable minutes only to be disappointed when walking away with absolutely nothing--how is it that the judges of film found this one so riveting? Was it that the two main rakes of the film are taking a short holiday in California Wine country (which, by the way, cannot even compete with Italian wines--California has become too market-focused and has over produced its soil...you're drinking mostly tannins nowadays...too peppery, too oaky...egad)? Why not just go on a wine tour rather than watch one miserable cad purpose to cheat on his fiance--thus confirming the fears of most women that today's man is shallow and sex-driven with no sense of morality, honor or chivalry--while the other pines over his very existence, reeking of self-hatred and weakness--other key qualities we modern women look for in a man...yeah, not really.
I did try to look for redeeming qualities in this film...I tried very hard. There aren't any really. Feel free to throw this in a coal furnace, not just throw coals at it.

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Chrystal Skull
-Starring Harrison Ford and Shia LaBeouf
Oh, Indy...why? Honestly...I know why. It's because George Lucas has replaced his brain (and therefore all inklings of imagination) with a CGI implant.
I was warned when purchasing my copy of this film, before seeing it, that it was a sad reflection of what was once greatness, but like many I had to complete my Indy collection. I admit, I did like the film a bit better than Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, but anyone who knows me also knows how much I LOATHE Kate Capshaw and her horrendous lack of basic acting skills. I did not, however, understand the desire for Lucas to go off the deep end with focus on extraterrestrials and natives who appear, fight with the skills of the ninja and then disappear with no real explanation. I had hoped, rather, that Lucas focus on some other REAL (albeit fringe) archaeological exploration right now--say in the existence of Atlantis? For those who don't know, there was a computer game by Lucas Arts called "Indiana Jones and the Fate of Atlantis" which had real promise for an actual plot. Lucus could've also used CGI with a purpose, then...like creating a believable underwater city!!!
On the acting side, Harrison was his usual self--if not a bit older. I could almost hear his bones creak with some of his stunts--and it was very hard not to visualize him with Callista Flockhart once or twice--especially whenever he held, or gazed at, that skeletal object at the centre of this plot.
Shia LaBeouf? Honestly, how long must we put up with Disney trained actors before Hollywood realizes that Disney does not automatically equivocate thespian perfection? The boy needs to go to school and learn the classics...
No one else really gains merit to be critiqued here.

There are others destined for the "Naughty" list, but they will have to wait as I'm tired, in want of a good night's rest and have yet to start the "Nice" list. Moving on, then!

NICE LIST:

My Blueberry Nights
-starring Jude Law and Norah Jones

Did you do a double take? Yes, I wrote "starring Norah Jones"...the singer. This surprising little indie film was filled with visual splendor as it was simple. Set in New York, you follow a heartbroken girl through a year of her life...but unlike so many movies celebrating the ugly, this film was written to acknowledge that pain exists, but should not become the object of life. That life moves on, and those who focus on self-pity and pain will become shells of who they were. It also celebrates the very real fact that moving from place to place will afford you new friends along with life experience--and give you appreciation for those you may have left behind. I believe this simple, sweet film explores the hidden beauty behind a stranger's eyes --simplified to the analogy of left-over blueberry pie.
Jude Law is particular eye-candy in this film (despite his lack of judgment regarding nannies), and Nora Jones is DELIGHTFUL--proving once again that true artists will find their talents blossom all the more they explore the many faceted forms of art. Enjoy!

Hellboy II: The Golden Army
-starring Ron Perlman
While everyone in Tinseltown is banking on superheroes, many overlook how brilliant director Guillermo del Toro is in his dark and creative superhero epic. Indeed, Batman, the Fantastic Four and Ironman all have their pull, but for those of us who enjoy del Toro's fantastic creativity and exploration of the art of storytelling--we could not wait until the release of this film. Perlman plays a devilishly delightful (sorry...couldn't help it!) "Hellboy", with his sarcastic remarks and larger-than-life personality. The plot was complex, and the costuming was as innovative as the first in the series.
Bravo!

Therese (1986)
-starring Catherine Mouchet

I picked this little film up from the local library, as I hadn't seen this particular film on the life of St. Therese, and having been so disillusioned by the latest film travesty by Leonardo DeFillipis, I wanted to improve my minds eye version of the life of one of my favorite Saints. I'd also like to add that, other than Mel Gibson's The Passion of the Christ, no other religious-based film out of the United States in the last few years has been worth mentioning--but the Europeans have had brilliant (and might I add LOW BUDGET) films worth seeing again and again: Padre Pio; Quo Vadis; Faustina; St. Francis; Into Great Silence to name a few...and now, adding this delightful film!!
With minimalist setting, the film places a lot of pressure on the cast, especially Mouchet, to captivate the viewer by personalizing their characters. I believe this is even more difficult knowing that "A Story of a Soul" has been read by millions, and St. Therese known and loved all the more! Mouchet is simply phenomenal in her portrayal of this great and simple woman--most endearing is her smile. It also is a wonderment that Mouchet looks so uncommonly like St. Therese--almost identical to her pictures! And, of course, one must mention the entire film is in French, making the entirety of the film more realistic.
I was in awe, and unlike my normal self, still am at loss for the proper words to describe this film. Definitely see it. You will not regret doing so!

G'Night, ladies and gents...I will continue, I promise!
Pax et Bonum

Monday, November 10, 2008

Anticipation, Argumentation and other "A" words...

Indeed, once again, it has been an awfully long time since I've written anything in the way of updates, etc. In addition to this, I've been quite negligent in maintaining contact with most of my friends...an unfortunate aspect to my personality when living/working/experiencing difficult times. Mea Culpa. So, for those interested, here's a little update to my life, as it is at present. I am, once again, living in Indiana.


I made the decision to move back into my parent's home after leaving my job as a teacher in PA, and having little prospects for employment out on the East Coast. I promised myself a year of auditioning in NYC, and trying to make contacts for musical theatre. This was made even more difficult while working full-time, but after two years of barely making a living...well, I needed time to regroup (financially) and rethink my future. This was, though, a major blow to my life-desires. Has anyone else had a similar blow...when you get to a point where, when someone asks you what your "dream job" would be...or what your goals are in life...you end up with a blank expression and really nothing to say? I honestly have NO idea why I was put here on earth. My life honestly seems to have no meaning or direction...like a boat adrift, without oars or sail. If you have an inspirational life-story where you were, at one time, down and out and without direction---and willing to share--please do. You have NO idea how much that would help me right now. These are the conclusions I have deduced since my (humiliating) return to Indiana in June: a) I refuse to continue working within the service industry. There is no future for me in this career field...and even if there was, I know that working 40 hrs. a week for $7.00/hr at Starbucks will not afford me the opportunities to work towards a Masters Degree...never mind the basic paying of bills and cost of supporting myself. b) I have the unfortunate position of holding a BA, being published and still unable to land a job that pays higher than $32,000 (and THAT offer was for Monterrey, CA--could translate in cost of living to about $22,000/year here in Indiana). c) I refuse to continue living in my present situation. My parents are tired of me (oh, no...don't get me started on that) and I'm OVER living on "charity". I am 26 years old, for God's sake! I need independence and a life! After surveying the situation as it stands, I have come to the conclusion that I have no other real prospects other than applying for a Commission as an officer in the Military. Many of my friends and even my spiritual director has asked me if this is what I want. I reply, simply, that I really have no other options here. I mean...I'm working at Starbucks!
At least, as an officer, I'll have the chance to train for something that will be valued both in the military and...if I end up not liking the military as a profession...outside in civilian world. So this is my drive. I HATE training for OCS. I HATE EVERY SINGLE SECOND of running...there is nothing that can change my mind on this. While I run, I try EVERYTHING to stop thinking about running...and still, in the back of my mind, I hear "you can't do this". But I have to. I have to because I simply cannot continue in the life that I'm living right now. That is why I've gone "hermitess" in the last few months. I've had no desire to meet up with people here in Lafayette. I have no desire to make friends. I want to make my life so miserable as to add fuel to the fire of motivation and drive to get into the Military. It worked for a while, but now that I've turned my application package into the Navy...and now that I must sit back and wait until December Boards, all I can do is work at Starbucks...eat, sleep and train for OCS... UGGH I think another real set-back for me is the knowledge of how, in my past experiences, I sucked at all things physical. The 13 weeks at OCS is pretty much all physical...and I'm already counting myself as being one of the ones "rolled" out of the class because of my poor endurance in running, etc. I KNOW I'm a strong personality with strong leadership/motivational skills for others...but I also know my weaknesses. The DI's will know really quickly, as well...and will exploit them. I fear failure at this because I anticipate it...I tried running with the Purdue ROTC guys about a month ago...5:30 AM in the morning, on my day off. I ended up lagging far behind (making them run in circles until I caught up) and sucking at the PT stuff in the sand-pits in between the running. In my experience, there are two types of people in this world. There are those who, in the face of challenges and almost absolute defeat, will take these as motivators for success. And then there are people like me, who, having met with defeat after defeat...see a challenge and just want to run and hide...and if that's not an option, just endure to survive it...who struggle and never really do get that "break" in life. I see OCS and my physical challenges there as if it's already inevitable...I've never been in the kind of shape they're going to expect me to be in by the time I get there. I just don't see me successful. And yet, this is my only option. I honestly have nothing else. So, I have to try. This "nada" is my motivation...negative though it may be. That and I really want to have approval and respect from my parents. It's an unfortunate thing for a first-born to admit that, despite the fact he/she worked hard to achieve a degree, they cannot obtain a job that will afford them stability and independence. I see my life as a failure through their eyes, and this is probably the most difficult thing to bear in all this. So, again, my "hermitess" state was nothing personal against any of you. I love and count on my friends! It's, rather, to spare you all from the dark cloud which hovers over my life in general, right now...and also spare me from seeking any real consolation from those who I know are generous in giving it. I really think that this misery will be the only way I'll be able to "look forward" to the 13 weeks of absolute HELL at OCS. I also admit that not having you all in my life, and not being able to share in yours has been very difficult for me. Actually, I HATE this. I HATE being alone, and feeling ostracized. I promise you, though, that when I do make it though OCS, I'll be happier and a much better person for it--because not only will I be serving my Country, I'll also be able to be proud of my achievements--and actually rewarded for them through financial/vocational stability. Please keep praying for me. I really do need a break...something to make these life-challenges seem a bit more positive rather than negative.
PAX!

Friday, August 22, 2008

Reliving the Memories...

Greetings, one and all! I promise to post again, soon...but I wanted to share an article from the LA Times, in which I was quoted...back in 2005. Wow. The LA Times! lol
Pax



Crowd Cheers, Sings, Prays

As white smoke streamed Tuesday from the slender chimney on the roof of the Sistine Chapel where the cardinals met to elect a new pope, the crowd of tens of thousands filling St. Peter’s Square surged forward.

They shouted with excitement: “Habemus papam!” (We have a pope!)

Some cheered, some sang. Many whipped out cellphones and typed in the words “white smoke.”

But when Chilean Cardinal Jorge Arturo Medina Estevez announced that the new leader of the world’s 1 billion Roman Catholics was Joseph Ratzinger, electricity seemed to give way to matter-of-factness.

We don’t know much about him, except that he’s quite closely linked with John Paul II,” said Ursula Kelly of County Derry, Ireland, who was in Rome with her husband for their 15th wedding anniversary. “But we’re just so glad to see it.”

Some groups applauded, some cheered, but the overwhelming sentiment was that a larger figure loomed over the scene – Pope John Paul II, who died this month.

It’s a hard act to follow. He is the only pope I’ve known,” said Paul Anderson, 25, a resident advisor for Chicago’s Loyola University semester abroad program in Rome who had come to the square every day since John Paul fell gravely ill.

Ratzinger seemed to sense John Paul’s shadow as well. When he emerged onto the marble balcony of St. Peter’s Basilica overlooking the square, the first sentence he uttered as Benedict XVI was an acknowledgment of his predecessor’s power.

After the great Pope John Paul II, the cardinals have elected me – a simple, humble worker in the vineyard of the Lord,” he said in Italian.

He raised his arms in greeting, turning from side to side, clasped his hands together and blew a kiss to the crowd, which filled the vast square and spilled into adjoining streets. The new pope appeared a bit stiff, perhaps not yet used to performing before a vast public.

Cardinal Justin Rigali of Philadelphia, who was looking down on the same crowd from an adjacent balcony, later described a scene of majesty as he gazed over St. Peter’s Square. “I was on the balcony to the right and what a view it was! All these tens of thousands of people and the wonderful welcome they gave the new pope. You heard them chant ‘Benedetto, Benedetto,’ ” the new pope’s name in Italian. So it started off well,” he said.

Silvana Dal Mas, an elderly nun of the Daughters of the Heart of Jesus who had come to Rome for the conclave, elbowed her way to the very front of the crowd. She said she would have preferred a Latin American pope, but when Ratzinger was named she quickly adjusted her sights.

I am happy,” she said, looking up at the balconies filled with cardinals. “People think the Germans are hard, but I come from near the border with Austria and when the Germans love, it’s sincere. This pope will

Mario Marazziti, the spokesman and a founding member of the Community of Sant’Egidio, a Catholic activist group that works with the poor and refugees, raced to St. Peter’s Square when he heard about the white smoke. He found himself surprised by the new pope’s demeanor.

To Marazziti, the usually stern Ratzinger seemed awestruck, even timid, as he stood on the balcony of the basilica, looking out at the crowd that had assembled to greet him.

I think he was uncertain; he was intimidated tonight,” Marazziti said. “He used minimalist words. And all of us today are the children of John Paul II who regard this strong and timid man

Most excited about his election were groups of young people who had been devoted to John Paul II and were eager to transfer their affections to a new spiritual leader.

Bree Dail, 23, who attends Christendom College in Front Royal, Va., snagged a seat in the front row on Monday and Tuesday along with a handful of her fellow students so that she could watch the new pope close up. She had spent much of the day saying the rosary with her friends, hoping the cardinals would come to a decision.

When she heard Ratzinger’s name, she leapt up, shouting and cheering. She, like so many others, could not help but associate him with the previous pope. “They gave us the best, [Ratzinger] has the heart of the Holy Father,” she said, referring to John Paul. “We are happy, we are ecstatic, it’s like we have a father.”

The day was overcast and chilly. Dark clouds scudded across the sky, making it hard to tell if the initial curl of smoke rising at dusk from the Sistine Chapel was gray tending to black, or gray tending to white.

The piazza that saw scattered groups of people earlier in the day appeared suddenly to have filled to bursting. A group of Spanish nuns leapt onto chairs and began to chant, “We have a pope!”

An older nun reproved them. “You don’t know for certain yet,” she said.

As the crowd, seeing the white smoke, called out “bianco, bianco,” a priest with his cellphone glued to one ear came out on one of the terraces that sits atop the majestic colonnade surrounding St. Peter’s Square and gestured frantically at the bell tower.

John Paul had decreed that in addition to sending up white smoke, the Vatican should ring the bells to announce a papal selection.

When the chimes finally were heard, the ringing was overwhelmed by the roar of the crowd, relieved and excited that the election of a new pope was real. Some waved papal flags, others flags from their home countries – Germany and Honduras, Mexico and the United States. As people waited, there were lulls in the cheers and some began to sing Italian hymns or chant prayers in Latin.

Vatican staff members – priests, nuns and lay workers – came out onto the roofs of the buildings surrounding St. Peter’s to watch the ceremony. News photographers and TV camera operators positioned themselves amid the statues that crown the colonnade.

As the cardinals prepared to introduce the new pope, assistants unfurled a velvet banner with the seal of John Paul and hung it in front of the papal balcony. Then, the grand glass doors were opened and, in a dramatic entrance, a long, deep red curtain was pushed aside to make way for the new pope.

The 115 elector cardinals gathered on adjoining balconies, their scarlet cassocks and skullcaps contrasting sharply with the white marble. It created a vivid tableau but also a moment of sober ceremony as they watched one of their own move into the most elite post in Christendom.

After a greeting and a few words, Ratzinger spoke in Italian. “I entrust myself to your prayers.” And the crowd chanted his new papal name.

With the dusk deepening and a damp wind rising, he ducked back inside the basilica.

With the new pope’s departure, the crowd began to drift off. A group known as Papa Boys, an informal youth group that sprang up during John Paul’s jubilee year, rallied a large circle of young Catholics to sing. They were hoping the new pope would make another appearance.

Many, however, who stood on the periphery of the swaying teenagers and 20-somethings had more questions than answers. “We’ll see if he has enough charisma to face this crisis of faith that we have in the church with people drifting away,” said Elena Fonte, 35, a lawyer. “I still think of John Paul II as pope; not of Ratzinger as pope.”

Times staff writers Sebastian Rotella and Geraldine Baum contributed to this report.